Cordelia Chase watched, eyebrows raised and fingers poised over the keyboard, as her boss bounced up the steps into the office with a smile on his face. A smile. A real, there-for-no-reason smile. She watched him flip through the newspapers and magazines on a table then the doughnuts in their pink box, licking icing he couldnt really taste off his finger. She watched him pour himself a cup of coffee and start whistling.

Over in the corner, Wesley slowly lowered his newspaper, disbelief stamped all over his face.

Angel gulped a mouthful of his coffee and crossed the room in three strides, leaning over to snatch a few folders off the reception desk. Morning, Cordelia. I like the way youve done your hair. Then he turned and bounced into his office, still whistling.

Utter silence prevailed as Cordelias hand flew to her sedate, quite un-Cordelia-like French twist.

Cordelia, Wesley began, Correct me if Im wrong, but I thought that was Angel.

Whistling, the brunette put in worriedly, And noticing my hair.

And BOUNCING! Wesley shook his head, nonplussed. Does Angel bounce? Or smile? Is he ill, do you think?

No, Wesley, hes not ill, hes dead, Cordelia rolled her eyes. Does my hair really look that awful?

Who said anything of the sort?

Angel noticed. Hello? Mr. Im-Brooding-And-Cryptic-I-Save-The-World-And-Suffer actually noticed? Does LA have a Hellmouth we dont know about, because this beats some of the things Ive seen in Sunnydale. Maybe I need a haircut, what do you think?

It had been a slow day, so he had an excuse to be here. Faith needed checking up on, not only to see if she was alright but to make sure she was actually doing what she said she was doing. At least, that was what Angel told himself as he pulled up in front of his building.

In daylight the area looked distinctly run down if not exactly seedy, not that he had gotten all that good a look at it that night ,being preoccupied with other things. The thought made image flash through his mind that made him shift gear hurriedly and head for the underground parking lot nearby.

A short walk through the sewers later, he was climbing up the dim stairs past walls where the paint was flaking off onto the cement floor. The place was a rat-hole. How could she live here?

It reminded him forcibly that she was still essentially a child, with no parents, no real friends and no place to go. How was she supporting herself? He racked his brain but the one solution he could think of was one he refused to imagine Faith in. Angel felt a twinge of all-too-familiar guilt. How could he have been so thoughtless as not to ask? He had had just one thing on his mind....fucking her blind.

His conscience snapped at him but he snapped back. Was he supposed to be an eunuch for the rest of his life, then? Buffy had moved on and so should he. As long as he did not love Faith, everything was fine. And he wasnt taking advantage of her because...because he cared, just not in that way. And he was here to help her heal.

That sounded lame even to him. Growling in frustration , he hammered on her door. And waited.

There was no answer.

Faith? He rapped again.

Silence.

He tried the knob and the door swung open before him, offering him a view of a dingy hall leading to the tiny front room. Angel took a step forward...and was immediately knocked back by an invisible barrier. She had done a revoking spell.

He hit the wall in fury.

Mister.

Angel spun on his heel, coat flaring out for a moment. An elderly Latina woman in an apron was standing in her doorway a short way down the hall. Go and make a ruckus somewhere else or Im callin the cops! Muttering to herself, she turned back to close her door.

Wait! Angel dashed down the hall and stopped the door from closing with one hand. The girl that lives in that apartment? Would you know where she is?

Beady black eyes looked him up and down speculatively. You her man?

His mouth flapped open before he remembered to shut it. No, I....its not like that...not really, but you could say, in a way....

Look, boy, either you are or you aint, so get your foot outta my door! the old harridan snapped.

Yes, I am. OK? Angel glanced warily at the metal spoon she was brandishing. So could you please tell me where she is?

The girl with the long black hair? The puta works down at Rina Starbursts Magic Shop. That said, she cracked the surprised vampire in the kneecap with her spoon and slammed the door in his face.

The smoky incense wrapped around him like a shroud the minute he parted the bead curtain and came into the dim, cavernous shop. All around him was a confusion of colours and objects piled seemingly haphazardly, from Tibetan devil-dance masks to Gothic crosses which he gave a wide berth.

He smelled and sensed the mortal woman behind the counter before she spoke, but it was not HER scent.

Welcome to the Cave of Wonders.

Hi, said Angel, moving towards the heavily made-up proprietress with the jangling jewellery. Im looking for...

A cross was thrust into his face, making him dance backwards and nearly trip over a basket of shawls.

You're one of them, Rina Starburst said. Demon, vampire, I dont serve your kind. Get out.

He held up his hands. Im not going to hurt you; I just want to speak to Faith.

You won't hurt me because Im going to hurt you if you dont get out. From under the counter the mystic took out a sword of the kind usually used in rituals. Theres no one by that name here.

Look, I just need to...

OUT! She raised the sword in one long-taloned hand.

With a snarl the ensouled vampire knocked aside the blade and slammed it down on the counter, pinning it down with his hand. Rina pushed the cross at him but he grabbed her hand, not caring that his flesh was beginning to sizzle as he shouted,

Faith! I know you can hear me and Im not leaving till you come out!

By Elsaroth and Anubis, Rina was saying furiously.

Dont bother, came a voice from the rear of the shop. Hes already cursed. Faith stepped out from behind a rack of herbs. What do you want, Angel?

Now THEREs a name for a vampire, the mystic muttered, letting go of the sword in disgust.

Faith, Angels voice was tightly controlled. We need to talk. He shot a look at the mystic. In private.

Rina arched a brow at the dark-haired Slayer. You sure about this?

Faith scowled. In the back. Theres a store-room.

The door had barely closed behind them when Angel bit out, You used a revoking spell.

Yeah, so? Faith settled on a crate.

Why? After we....

Had sex? She glared at him. We did the wacky so Im supposed to trust you enough to let a vampire have his very own Welcome Mat on my doorstep? I dont think so. My lifes none of your business.

He swallowed down a rise of anger. Wrong, Faith. You came into my city just like that and run a sideline as a hired tough with supernatural strength and say its none of my business? I thought that night that youd changed in prison, but you havent, not really.

Changed? She spat out. You dont know changed, Angel! Have you ever been in prison? Even been in one of those homes? You know what its like, its like a jungle in there where youve got to watch your back every second and you can't take the easy way out and stake the ones who want to get you. So you watch and wait, watch and wait especially when its dark and you're alone and you know the feeling of having your hands tied. They come again and again and finally you snap and you get them, she said in a fierce whisper, eyes glinting as she rocked on the crate, drawing one knee up to her chest protectively. Then no one touches you and you dont talk to anyone because theyre all afraid of you but its better than being...

She hissed, drawing in breath between her teeth as if she was in pain.

Angel stared at her, appalled. Her pain was like a palpable thing pulsing between them.

She laughed, looking up at him. You were at the trial, right?

He had made sure no one could see him. At least, that what he thought.

I felt you, you know. My shadowy mentor. She rested her chin on her knee, still rocking slightly to and fro. B wasnt there. She saw the flicker in his eyes and felt an irrational sadness. You still love her, huh?

Always, Angel said quietly. She keeps in touch. She left Riley some time ago.

He was like a kid picking at a scab, Faith thought. Couldnt leave his pain alone. No kidding. Whos she with? She wasnt any better than him herself.

Spike.

She had to think for a bit before it fell into place. William the Bloody? Your Childe? His expressionless face was all she needed for an answer. Wow, Bd used the sensitivity of an iron hammer here.

Life sure fucked us both, didn't it?

Were paying the price for all the evil we did.

Doesnt it ever end, the paying? Youve been paying for what, a hundred years? How much do we have to pay before we can have even a bit of happiness?

No one knows.

She slid off the crate onto the floor. He joined her there and they sat with their backs resting against the rough wood.

Whyd you really come, Angel?

He thought for a moment. I was angry when I found youd done a revoking spell. I guess I felt hurt that you dont see me as worthy of your trust. He turned away so she could only see his face in profile. But trust must be earned, I know.

Her hand didn't falter when she touched his cheek. Some part of me wants to hurt you, Angel. You get that? Some part of me wants to see you dusted.

He turned to look at her, into her eyes. Its the other part I want to see. The kiss was not the earth-shattering thing it had been with Buffy, but there was passion and he was as lonely as she was. In a way they needed each other.

Their tongues stroked and twined together and before she knew it she was breathing heavily, thighs shifting on the floor trying to get enough friction to relieve the burning that was building in her. His hands were stroking under her skirt and gripping her waist, kneading the taut flesh as they moved upwards. She gasped when his fingers reached her breasts. Hands, she loved his hands. Big, cold, rough-surfaced yet gentle, so unlike her own.

Demon with the Face of an Angel. Killer with the Face of a Girl-Child.

Three days, Angel groaned as his nails raked her flesh not quite hard enough to hurt. Fifty years felt longer.

She put her hand on his chest, looking down at him with all her concentration. Her poison. How come I keep wanting you? she whispered as her back hit the floor and his weight came down deliciously on her. How fucking come? Like a drug, its like a drug... The need rose like a black tidal wave to consume them.

He took her on the floor of the room, the both of them tangled in each other as their bodies strained and they kissed to stifle their cries. She wrapped her arms tight around him as if to let go was to let go of sanity and Life, listening to her name becoming a melody, a thread of sound on his tongue whispering into her ear. And if she closed her eyes it almost seemed as if the whole world had disappeared and just for these few moments she was loved and needed. There was no judgement and there was no loneliness.

Then she reached the crest and the whole world seemed to spin around her. Her eyelids fluttered, half-closing. It had never been like this before with anyone else. Before she had always been in control even when playing the submissive role in all the games...She pushed the thought aside. She controlled the men she fucked, that was it. Played with them and enjoyed them while keeping apart the whole time. With him it was like losing herself piece by piece, yet she was enjoying it so damn much!

He was kissing the mark on her shoulder where his blunt teeth hadnt quite broken skin.

I need to get back to work. She pulled away, feeling him slip out of her with a gush of their combined fluids down her inner thighs, making the heat start to pulse again. She ignored it, pulling her underwear straight and zipping up her pants, the dampness making her belly muscles constrict.

He watched her for a moment before rolling to his feet with a cat-like grace that made her swallow. Faith found herself looking anywhere but at him as he zipped himself up.

Fuck, girl, since when did you turn into a nun? Hes a magnificent male animal, alright.

Faith?

Yeah?

Whatever work you do on the side, dont hurt anyone. I can't promise I won't hurt you if you do and more importantly, youll hurt yourself in ways you dont even know.

Ill hurt those that need hurting. She opened the door. Dont get in my way, Angel, and I won't get in yours.

They didn't say what they both knew; they would meet again. The heat in his brown eyes and the sudden sadness in her heart told her that.