Tell Them

Title: Tell Them
Authors: Mitzy Kat and Pam Elfman
Feedback: Mitzy-q711cowgrrl@hotmail.com or Pam-watcher@lobbyist.com
Notes: This is the result of my obsession with Buffy & Faith + having an 80 foot poster of Celine Dion outside my bedroom window. I wrote this with my RL friend, Pam: The Voyager fanatic. During the writing of this, we listened to "Tell Him", the original version, non-stop. Send Food NOW!!! This is a BIG GAY parody of the Barbra Streisand & Celine Dion super schmaltzy diva duet: "Tell Him".

(Fade In)

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

I'm scared.
So afraid to show I care.
Will she think me weak?
When I love her so deep.
Ooooh - what if
There's another one she's thinking of.
Maybe she's in love.
I'd feel like a fool.
Life can be so cruel.
I don't know what to dooo...

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

I’m Queer,
Though I've always loved men before,
But what you must understand,
I won't let the chance
To love you pass me by...

All:

Tell them,
Tell them that we're gay;
It's so, so obvious.
Come out to them.
All dyked-out, dyked-out in our gay apparel.

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

It gets me in the mood to bush-beat.

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

Masturbation is the gift you give yourself.

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):Fist me...

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

...ooh...

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

...with the gentleness I want inside..

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

...I feel it......

Our hormones cannot be denied.

The truth will set us free;
We are what's meant to be,
All in time you'll see.

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

Oooh, I love you.

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

Then show me.

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

Of that much I can be sure.

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

Hold me close to you.

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

I don't think I could endure,
Not to let them know we're gay
When it's so vital to say.

All:

Then, tell them,
Tell them that we've found someone new and who it is.
Come out to them.
And shrieking, com..mands and ob-scen-ities.

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

We'll be like two cats in deep heat.

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

Love will be the gift we give ourselves...
We are right with those who know.
In our hearts our love will grow.
Its a steady flame that flowwwws.

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

Feed the subtext with all the passion -- we can show.

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

Tonight's love will assume its place.

Janeway & Buffy & Xena (Barbra):

Our good times cannot be erased.

All:

Our 'Faith' will shove love where it has to go.

Tell them,
Tell them that we're in love;
It's so, so obvious.
And Butch & Femme
Are roles, roles we play so fucking well.

Seven & Faith & Gabrielle (Celine):

Elope with me this very night....lets
Hope to hell that there’s noooo...
Catfight.

Ohhhhh...

All:

We're just...big homos.

(Fade out)


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